The Project Gutenberg eBook of Flight from New Mu
This ebook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and
most other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
of the Project Gutenberg License included with this ebook or online
at www.gutenberg.org. If you are not located in the United States,
you will have to check the laws of the country where you are located
before using this eBook.
Title: Flight from New Mu
Author: Joe Archibald
Illustrator: Mel Hunter
Release date: February 15, 2026 [eBook #77947]
Language: English
Original publication: New York: King-Size Publications, Inc, 1955
Credits: Tom Trussel (This file was produced from images generously made available by The Internet Archive)
*** START OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FLIGHT FROM NEW MU ***
Flight from New Mu
by Joe Archibald
_The time-eroded blurbal bromide: “Thomas X--needs no introduction
to our readers” has a vigorously new and forceful pertinence when
applied to Joe Archibald. For complete, star-bright veracity is never
platitudinous. And we venture to predict that if there is a single
one of our readers who is not already an incurable Archibaldian-humor
addict he’ll become one when he reads this rollicking new saga of
Septimus Spink, star-treader extraordinary._
=Septimus Spink had his own ideas about flying disks. They embraced a
haywire recklessness--and a survival capacity second to none.=
_Interplanetary Press--April 10, 2022. Septimus Spink, sole survivor
of the Earthian space ship, XXX, was released by the Metropolita
Neuropsychiatorium today pronounced as cured as he ever will be.
Despite a series of neurotherapeutic high velocity shock treatments,
Spink steadfastly refused to recant one word of the story that sent him
to the cuckooery. Interviewed by Mars’ leading news analyst, Awon R.
Mowow, Spink said he was confident that he would be the first citizen
of known planets to reach New Mu._
_“I am sure,” Spink said, “that the characters who took me out of the
XXX were natives of New Mu. Correction. I most likely will be the
second Earthian to reach that planet. I will not tell you why as they
will fling me right back into Bedlam on my plutonylon rompers.”_
_“You still believe what you said about Subcommander Cquob, Fixius
Snark and Quartus Goog?” Mowow asked Spink._
_“You can quote me,” Spink said forcibly. “They got nicked by a strange
rebound of the nick of time. When I left the XXX hanging in space with
gravity pulling it at both ends, their space suits were as empty as
Senatorial campaign promises. Looks like we’ll have to find a citizen
named Sir Isaac Neutron. Ha!”_
_“What are your immediate plans, Spink?” a Venutian viso-newscaster
queried, discreetly keeping his distance._
_“As definite as a Nougatine’s peace proposal.” Spink retorted. “You
know that the Unigovernment of Earth figures I have not collected all
my ids and libidoes yet and so can’t be put back in status quo with
Space Squadron Spearhead. It is a fine uraniumite kettle of smelts,
gentlemen, what with the Nougatines rearmin’ again. You know the new
Number One here has forgot about defense and has spent most of the
budget on research into the metabolism of the organism. They still
laugh at flyin’ saucers like they did in 1954, but it is too bad Keyhoe
ain’t alive as I could tell him I rode in one.”_
_Spink hotly denied he had been offered three thousand Unigovernment
clams per week for appearing in a Martian Nocturnal torrid spot._
* * * * *
Yeah, that’s what the newspapers said. Even in these times they don’t
print all the truth. They forgot about the strings I pulled with the
Metropolita ward heelers, and the writ of habeus corpus. I’m out,
even though I am watched as close as the seventh son of a seventh son
with a bad case of croup. There is some things I did not tell the
Twenty-fourth Estate as according to the records of the Spinks in my
hermetically sealed cylinder they did not breed many idiots.
If a relative of mine got me down here in a flying saucer, I am quite
sure the character will decide to pick me up some day. And I’ll bet
they’ve already towed the Earthian space pencil, XXX to one of their
saucer garages. Well, only time will tell, and I hope it doesn’t play
me as dirty a trick on me as it did Fixius Snark and Quartus Goog.
Being one of Earth’s better known viso-screen hams, I am working at my
favorite hobby one day when the Nougats hit Mars with a Pearl Harbor.
Three Hydroradiumjets hit a Martian blasting-off station in medium
outer space and wash it up faster than the Metropolita Yanks did
Cincinnatu’s star southpaw in the last Interworld Series. I see and
hear Earth brass contact the war lords of Mars and Venus. Even Jupiter
is jumping.
“All right, I am grounded,” I says. “I am a combo of Section Eight and
Four F Minus, and am I blue! I will just put in a supply of popcorn an’
beer capsules and watch this on my favorite station. I might even go
fission.”
Then I hear the voice of Number One Coordinator of Space Strategic
Command, Bjaal yelp, “Callin’ all space pilots, ready or not. Calling
all space pilots. Inner and outer space pilots! Everybody who can walk.
This also means you, Septimus Spink.”
“I will protest!” I yelps. “I am a mental case. I want a space lawyer!
“All malingerers will be shot at once!” Bjaal says in a pall-bearer’s
voice. “This is a war of survival. Operation Curtains will go in effect
at once.”
“I changed my mind,” I says and run out of the house. My space suit and
hot rocket are in the garage and I am about to open the door when I
hear a voice behind me and it is not of this world. I pivot and look at
something I didn’t believe the first time I saw it.
“Exquobo gritzmo lexiquosoma!”
The face is familiar, especially the nose. The character has two big
eyes that bug out like those of a bullfrog with thyroid trouble. His
skin is the color of a half ripe lemon. It is the C.O. of the creeps
that dragged me out of the XXX! The little antenna on his pearshaped
noggin is making little dada-dit-dit-da-da-dit sounds.
“You are still out in left field an’ I don’t understand a word of your
gibberish,” I says. “Look, git lost, as I have to go to war.”
“Jazplosa!” the thing says and his eyes look mad. Six other
yellow-pussed characters come from back of the garage and grab me,
and not with what you call hands. They have lunch-hooks that are like
tendrils from jungle plants and they wrap them around me, pick me up
like I am only a marshmallow and lug me off. A few minutes later I see
that they have landed the saucer on the flat roof of a French-Venutian
hand laundry and it looks like it is made of aluminum as thin as a
Martian pancake.
“Twuik nojux obwique Spink.”
“Spink?” I yelps. “Then you know me, huh?”
The outlandish citizen with a nose like all the Spinks, grins at me
as I am carried up the ladder leading down from the saucer. “Loxmiza
nostratum,” he squawks.
“And put mustard on mine,” I says as I am put aboard the saucer. “I was
kiddin’ myself, huh? I am still in the bughouse and will wake up snug
in my orlonylon strait jacket. At least I hope so!”
It is a retake of an opium dream the dome probers claim I had. The
inside of the saucer is as spiffy as any lounge in a Neo Yorkus
coupon-clipper’s club. Then the C.O. of the lemon-skins takes me into
the control room.
“Spink,” he says, “you are a cousin of mine, twelve times removed!”
You could have knocked me over with a spider leg. “You talked English,”
I gulp out. “Where are you from, er--?”
“Quantum Spink,” the character says. “I am taking you to New Mu.”
“Why, that is a million trillion miles from Nougat,” I says. “Who
taught you to speak English, huh?”
“Why an Earthman named Spink, of course,” Quantum says, and hands me a
plate of something that looks like green sawdust. “Eat it, Sep. It is
homogenized ambrosia.”
“If you don’t mind I’ll take one of my own veal cutlet capsules,”
I says, and then there is a lot of gabbing and some whirring and
clackety-clack sounds. Arrows start spinning every which way on the
instrument panel, and Quantum Spink pulls a little switch and four
seconds later I look out and see that we are already passing Asphasia.
It is only the rim of the saucer that spins, the New Muan tells me.
“I guess you know the Nougats took a wallop at Mars,” I says.
Quantum grins. “We will take care of that on the way, Sep. One thousand
New Mu military saucers, carrying Substance YZ2HO, will rendezvous ten
million miles southeast of Saturn at 1400 sound hours. We will contact
them in just five minutes. You’ll see a celestial rhubarb no Earthman
ever dreamed up.”
“Look, can we take pictures?” I ask, sweating radio-active beads. “I
got throwed into a space nuthatch the last time, or did you know?”
“We have a hydrolens camera, Sep,” Quantum assures me. “I will give you
some prints.”
* * * * *
I take a gander through the porthole and planets go by like milestones
on the Lincoln elevated throughway.
“No Spink has ever missed a war,” Quantum says and crams a handful of
ambrosia into his mouth. “I had to come and get you.”
“I’ll never be able to thank you,” I sniff. “L-Look, cousin, that
looks like a school of minnows but we ain’t near no water. There’s a
thous--it is the saucers!”
“Axtonithula!” Quantum yips into a mike he snatches up! “Gargus! Zoona!
Yagiz! Hooxl! Yax Benzi!” He puts down the mike and says he has ordered
his four squadron leaders to prepare for the attack on the Nougat
rockets that are now just a million miles away. “We want to capture
their leader, Mepha Spaam, alive!”
“That I must see,” I says. “Nobody, but nobody can convince me I’m
here, and if I am not I am cuttin’ out paper dolls back in the
neuropsychiatorium, and I don’t know which is worst or more unhealthy!”
“Your forebears would give their shirts to be here, Sep,” the New Muan
side of the family says.
“In a few light seconds I will ask them personally, Quantum,” I retort,
and wipe enough worry dew off my pan to oil all the saucers all around
us. “The Spinks sure never missed a thing, did they?”
It is about ten seconds away, the most decisive battle in the history
of a dozen worlds. Waterloo, the Marne, Midway, hah; spitball fights.
Wait until I tell you.
“Flumpozza!” my wierd cousin yelps, and I find out after that it is
New Muan for ‘Tallyho!’ All the little pear-headed citizens take their
battle stations, and then I see guns stick their noses out of the
ports all around the flying saucer. Just picture a pin-wheel buzzing
a quadrillion revs every minute, and shooting ammo loaded with worse
than hydrogen or split-up atoms. In less time than it took me to say
Liberace the New Muan saucers chew through a wedge-shaped formation of
Nougatine jets.
It is like a thousand circular saws have busted loose and all I can
hear is parts of rockets pelting down on the roof of the saucer’s
control cabin. A Nougat rocket shell spits through the saucer right
over my dome and leaves a hole you could drive a cow through, but in
the very next second there is no hole. It has sealed itself.
“Get me the head nurse!” I yelp. “I need a shock treatment!”
I look out through the port and see that we are chasing a Nougat space
ship right over the top of Asphasia. It is red and black and has a
four-legged bird painted on the top.
“It is Mepha Spaam’s rocket,” Quantum says. “Watch, Sep!”
The enemy space hot rod is galloping at least forty thousand miles
every half a minute but the New Mu crate is outlegging it faster than
a rabbit does a turtle with arthritis. Then a beam of light shoots out
from Quantum’s saucer and stabs at the Nougatine space buggy and all at
once my tongue glues itself to the roof of my mouth and my eyes bulge
out worse than those of the citizen sitting next to me. The saucer
stops dead in space and so does the Nougat hot rod.
“Exzogu Mifto zmack!” Quantum barks into his intercom, and then I
look out and see a dozen New Muans running along the beam carrying
roscoes. The saucer’s gunners cover the citizens, and a shell loaded
with Substance YZ goes off and knocks part of the Nougatine’s dorsal
fin off. The Nougats break out a white flag. “We have found out how to
magnetize light rays after we harness ’em, Sep,” Quantum says. “We have
also succeeded in bending light rays. How’s progress on Earth?”
“Oh, we’re still drivin’ horses compared to you, cousin,” I says, my
wits near the end.
I look out the port again. The New Muans are coming back across the
beam with Mepha Spaam, a citizen who must have been a descendant of
Hitler, the old Hun. Spaam has a big head with one eye, a chest like
a barrel and a pair of legs no thicker than a crane’s. He wears a
transparent helmet and an anti-gravity girdle. He is burning worse than
the inside of Mt. Vesuvius and is gnashing teeth meshed like the jaws
of a bear-trap.
Spaam is brought into the saucer and trussed up with green ropes.
“Brooomahoohoo!” he rips out. “Glopzatma!”
“It is a good thing we don’t know what he is callin’ us,” I says.
“Would you like to talk with Earth, Sep?” Quantum asks. “I will let you
report that the universe is again safe for Democrats.”
“All but Maine,” I sniff. “They never got beyond the atom!”
The light beam is snapped off, and the saucer begins spinning. Quantum
juggles the dials on his unlimited space set and I keep my eye peeled
on the viso-screen. We get a shot of a football game on Venus, a
beauty contest on Neptune, and a dog show on Uranus. Then the inside
of headquarters of Earth’s Strategic Space Command begins to shape up.
Looking out at me is Commander Bjaal.
“Talk to him, Sep,” Quantum says and hands me a mike shaped like a
calla lily.
“Septimus Spink callin’ Earth!” I gulp. “Spink callin’ Commander Bjaal
from New Mu space saucer. We have annihilated the Nougatine space
armada and have taken Mepha Spaam a prisoner. Over and over!”
“Y-You’re in a saucer, Spink?” Bjaal howls through outer and outer
space.
“Ha ha ha, and I am in limbo. And you will be out on one pullin’ this
booboo on me.”
“Awright,” I says, “take a look at my pal here, Bjaal. He is not made
up for Hallowe’en. Show yourself, cousin.”
Quantum Spink moves in beside me and Bjaal gets as white as bleached
milk, and faints like a dame coming face to face with a Martian mouse.
It is two minutes later he gets his marbles back.
“Calling Commander Bjaal,” Quantum says in the native tongue of one of
his forefathers. “When it rains superduraluminadamatine particles you
will believe us. This is Quantum Spink, Commander of Saucer Escadrille
of New Mu. There’ll be no good news in the Nougat Bars tonight. Venus
will need no arms, ha! Oh, mad’mois’elle from Armentiers--”
It is right then and there I know that this New Mu denizen is my
cousin. “Hand me the mike, pal,” I says.
“Calling Commander Bjaal, all quacks in the Neuropsychiatorium in
Neo Yorkus!” I snap. “I will sue when I get back to Earth for false
incarceration in the violent ward. It is I, Septimus Spink who controls
Earth in the palm of my hand. One word from me and New Mu knocks you
loose from the solar system. Give all the school kids a three day
holiday! Over and out!”
“We are nearin’ New Mu,” Quantum says, and reduces speed. I look out
the little port over the instrument panel and am the first Earthman to
see the remote planet. It is shaped like a fifteen cent baseball that
kids have used in three straight ball games and has a greenish-yellow
nimbus around it. Quantum gives his crew orders in his native gabble
and the saucer comes in and sits down on a saucer drome as if it
weighed half as much as an ounce of goose feathers.
“First,” Quantum says, “you will have to enter the chlorophlization
chamber, Sep. You wouldn’t live two minutes with red blood as you are
not part plant like we Muans. It won’t hurt a bit. We mix up the sun’s
rays with extract from the vital plant, zyxotheum. Just follow me.”
I am taken in a hurry to the place that is shaped like the dome on the
capitol building in Washington, and medicos of New Mu grab me, peel
off my Earthman’s Brooker Brothers suit, and sit me in a little metal
bucketseat. They move things that look like sunlamps up close, then
pull a master switch. Everything turns greenish-yellow and I tingle all
over like an old maid finding a burglar in a closet. The little chamber
hums like ten million bees at work.
Quantum says that more than rays come out of the tricky lamps. Moisture
comes also which is from the zyxotheum plant mixture, and is absorbed
by my pores.
“In other words, Sep,” he divulges, “you sweat in reverse.”
“Is that good?” I choke out.
“Your blood stream will absorb the
chlorophyl,” my cousin many times removed says.
At this moment I wished he had been removed before saucers were
invented on New Mu.
* * * * *
A half hour later I am taken out of the chamber into another room where
a New Muan interne pricks my finger with a needle. My hair stands on
end and lepidoptera gambol in my alimentary canal. I bleed green. The
little medical citizen nods approvingly at Quantum.
“You are ready to set forth into the city of Yzocspink,” cousin says.
“You will most likely get decorated along with me. New Mu’s highest
military award is the Crow De Spink. Are you beginning to see, cousin?”
“Yeah. A Spink got here all right back in 1918. Name of Cyril.
Nicknamed Muley,” I gulped and see a big sign over a building shaped
like a wedding cake and as easy to see through as a politician’s
mullarkey or a Jovian nightie. It says: SPINK VAXOZTZ.
“The Spink Museum,” Quantum says. “We have the Spink University Of
Advanced Solartechnology, the Spink Baseball Stadium, and the Spink
Zoological Gardens. The first space ship ever to leave Earth is in the
museum, and a statue of Cyril Spink stands out in front. Made of an
alloy of pollybdeum and thyrodium, and won’t ever wear out.”
“If I remember the records back in my hermetically sealed cylinder,” I
says. “There was a kraut went up in that rocket with Cyril Spink.”
“Ha,” Quantum laughs. “He got chicken just after the takeoff and
jumped out in a parachute. Maybe he landed in the Earthian alps and is
preserved in old fashioned ice.”
A few minutes later I am gazing at the twenty foot high statue of Cyril
“Muley” Spink, Circa 1918. He is wearing a flying suit of that era when
citizens flew as high as ten thousand feet. “He was the Thomas Edison
of New Mu,” my cousin says. “There were only three hundred thousand
people here when he arrived. Now there are seven million.”
“It is hard to believe,” I says. “We Spinks could divide but we
multiplied pretty lousy.”
“We have an Earthian-New Mu dictionary,” Quantum tells me. “Or I should
say English-New Mu lexicon. Half of us can talk your language, Sep.”
Me and Quantum are taken to the New Mu High Command and decorated with
the Crow De Spink. Afterward we go out onto a balcony and look down on
the city of Yzocspink and my dome spins around worse than the time I
first guzzled a fifth of Martian Bambuie. And when I walk the ground
comes up and meets my feet instead of the other way around, and Quantum
says it’s the chloryphyl in me. What worries me most is the two feelers
that pop out of my noggin, but cousin tells me they’ll go back as soon
as I am dechlorophylized.
Yzocspink is built out of metal, I am told, four hundred times lighter
than balsa wood and that no guided missile has been invented that can
cut through it. All the buildings are round on top and the city looks
like the back of a monstrous whale covered with yellowish green water
blisters.
“We will get into my private saucer and go home,” Quantum says. “You
must meet my daughter, Zyb.”
“Huh?” I force out of my throat. “Look, Cousin, I--er--that is, can’t I
just leave now. I forgot somethin’ important on Earth. I forgot to stay
there. Let’s talk things over.”
It is then that I hear the bad news. Quantum Spink looks at me like
I am a rodent from Nougat. “What do you think I came after you for,
Septimus Spink? I’ll tell you! If Earth wants to survive another light
year a true Spink will marry my daughter. Any questions?”
“N-N-No!” I gulp, and guess no Spink back over the centuries ever was
in a worse kettle of planetary smelts.
I go quietly with Quantum in the saucer, watch him close as he putters
with the instrument panel. There is a loud swish. I blink my eyes,
cough once, and we are sitting down on the Quantum Spink patio. Out
comes Zyb. She has hair that looks like cornsilk, which later I
discover to be just that. She wears a thin dress like the old Roman
dolls and displays as many curves as a Senatorial southpaw.
She says in my native tongue, “Oh-h-h-h, daddy. This is Septimus” and
right away I get a load of New Mu woo.
I guess they don’t have no inhibitions or finishin’ schools on the
planet as she is wrapped around me like a vine while pushing my nose
with hers which is New Mu’s way of kissing. I am trapped, I says to
myself frantic. I must get out of here. Quantum says the wedding
ceremonies will begin at eight and will last for three days. There will
be great joy on New Mu.
“Thank you, daddy,” Zyb says to Quantum. “It is the most wonderful
birthday present. An Earthman. A true Spink. I will be the leading lady
of New Mu.”
I tell myself I will have to work fast before Quantum Spink calls
in a lot of his flunkies. One thing I have noticed and that is that
New Muans can’t run any faster than armadillos. I judge the distance
to Quantum’s saucer, and take off. The New Muan cup-cake let’s out
a screech as I dump her into a clump of shrubbery. Quantum rushes
into the house as I dash for the saucer and I know he is not after a
plantfood sandwich. I am ten feet from the saucer when he comes out and
yelps for me to halt. Of course I don’t and then I see a tree disappear
right next to my elbow as the disintegrator ray hits it.
The second time his aim will be better I am quite sure, and I am very
thankful for the buoyancy offered me by my chlorophyl content as I make
the jump. I soar through space and into the saucer, then bang the door
behind me. As desperate as any Spink back through the ages ever was I
try all the switches. Nothing happens. Sweating yellowish green fright
ping-pong balls, I look out through the port and see half a hundred New
Muans sweeping toward the saucer.
I yank another switch, and the saucer starts spinning, and suddenly
takes off with a whining whooshing Banshee sound that scares my pants
to half mast. It is impossible! I am taking off from New Mu in a flying
saucer! I am sure Cyril “Muley” Spink would have done the same if he’d
had a saucer in 1918.
Well, I says to myself, “Calm down, Septimus. This is where you must
use your dome an’ not get hysterics. You are in a New Mu saucer with
gadgets all marked in New Muan gibberish, and if ever a Spink flew by
the seat of his pants you have got to now.”
Nothing ever flew faster not even the XXX that took me back into time.
I sneak a glance out of the front office and expect to see a lost angel
thumbing a ride, but instead I discover I am hedge-hopping an outer
space atomic service station. I picture the solar system in my mind
and look for Auxiliary Moon 3 that Quantum told me served New Mu. I
must have flown ten million miles before I spotted it. I take a small
notebook out of my pocket that I filled up with Celestial data when I
studied Superadvanced Astronavigation at the Harvardian night school.
On page 11 I find what I am looking for. “Consider now the location
of Planet Q. We can specify its position in relation to Planet X by
computing its zenith distance, ZQ, and the azimuth from angle QZS,
and then multiply by 7.3416. Every star has its fixed time passing
the meridian by the universal siderial clock and this time is called
the right ascension of the star. By using the Einstein III theory of
relativity, one planet to the other, it will not be too difficult to
determine your way around the solar system. Nutation must be kept in
mind, parallaxical phenomena kept in consideration.”
“No wonder I flunked,” I says. “Just let me spot Nougat an’ I’ll know
the rest of the way.”
I fly close to Pluto and some nuclear fission plus hydrogel coughs up
at me, and I pull a lever to the right and head for where I think I’ll
find Saturn. I only miss it by ten thousand miles which was a close
call seeing that was only a tenth of a second out of the way. But I do
not need no sky map now. Just ten million miles southeast is the milky
way and the dippers and even the dumbest astrogators know that you only
have to slide down the little constellations making up the handle of
the big one and head straight for good old Earth.
I make it in ten minutes flat, circle over the Kremlin in Neo Moscow
and hop the Atlantis in a fraction of a second. I keep flying in
circles over Metropolita until I find the thingmajig that slows down
the saucer. All the harnessed-up energy from the world’s uranium
mines are tossed up at me but nothing has been invented or discovered
anywhere that will penetrate the New Mu flying saucer.
I finally glide down and land in Centralia Park, and thousands of
citizens head for the bomb shelters. I get up and my legs buckle under
me like dahlia stems, and remember I am still half a plant.
I push the door open and stagger down the steps that automatically
fall into place. Half the armored might of the Eastern Defense Area is
rolling toward the saucer. I wave my arms and yelp, “It is I, Septimus
Spink!” and then fall flat on my proboscis.
And I do mean flat.
I open my eyes and look up into the face of Commander Bjaal. “L-Look,”
I says. “Get me to the Metropolita Medical Center an’ don’t spare
the saucers. I am full of chlorophyl and need at least ten blood
transfusions. These feelers on my dome ain’t pasted on, Buster!”
“A saucer!” Bjaal yelps. “A New Muan flyin’ saucer. Spink, where in the
world did you--?”
“Are you kiddin’?” I choke out. “Not this world, General. Quick, an
ambulance! And throw water on me on the way as I am wilting like any
petunia pulled up by the roots.”
They get me to the hospital and pump red blood back into my veins. A
nurse faints when she sees I bleed green when they poke the needle in
my arm. Interplanetary newshounds crowd the operating room. The word
goes to Mars, Venus, Jupiter, everywhere.
A nurse says, “Look, Doctor, his feelers are disappearing. His skin is
getting pink.”
“You are a cute number,” I says to the nurse. “But you should see Zyb.
She blushes purple. Uhg!”
They keep me under observation for three days and then let me get up.
I feel as if I had been towed through all the subways in the U.S. by a
hot rocket, but after all I have not just been around the corner to the
drugstore for a concentrated malted.
* * * * *
The next A.M., at a news conference covered by correspondents as far
away as Asphasia, I tell my story. I give the bug-eyed characters an
account of the wiping out of the Nougat Space squadron, description of
the statue of Cyril Spink on New Mu, and of the Rocket, Circa 1918, I
saw in the Spink museum.
The high cockalorums of the Neuropsychiatorium in Metropolita demand
my removal back to the cuckoo’s nest, until the brass shows them the
saucer I delivered F.O.B. from New Mu. Instead of a strait jacket I
get the Interplanetary Nobel prize and a dozen medals. They make me a
Subcommander in Space Squadron X9.
A sample of the green blood they took out of my pipes was sent to the
lab for analysis. A scientist reports that it can be manufactured
in great quantities if ever the Allied Planetary war lord deemed
it necessary to invade New Mu! The saucer, Bjaal said, would be
manufactured by the millions once the smart boys of the age figured out
the stuff it was made of.
Three weeks later pieces of the shellacked Nougatine air force fall on
Metropolita and leave a film the color of gray snow on the street. And
about the same time when I started hamming with my viso-screen I pick
up Quantum Spink. Cousin, to my surprise, is not sore at me, and says
he won’t attack Earth.
“Only a Spink could do what you did, Sep. I can’t blame the universe,”
Quantum says to me. “What else they ever said about the Spinks, they
had sportin’ blood. Green or red. Ha! Over and out!”
“You are a pal,” I says. “Tell Zyb I will send her a package of vigoro
for Xmas. Over.”
I look out the window at the flying saucer that is on exhibition atop
the four thousand foot Empiric Building and sigh deeply. The great
wonders of the world, The Pyramids of Cheops in Egypt and the Spinks of
Earth and New Mu. As modest as I am I have to admit it.
Transcriber’s note:
This etext was produced from Fantastic Universe, May 1955 (Vol. 3, No.
4.). Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S.
copyright on this publication was renewed.
Obvious errors have been silently corrected in this version, but minor
inconsistencies have been retained as printed.
*** END OF THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK FLIGHT FROM NEW MU ***
Updated editions will replace the previous one—the old editions will
be renamed.
Creating the works from print editions not protected by U.S. copyright
law means that no one owns a United States copyright in these works,
so the Foundation (and you!) can copy and distribute it in the United
States without permission and without paying copyright
royalties. Special rules, set forth in the General Terms of Use part
of this license, apply to copying and distributing Project
Gutenberg™ electronic works to protect the PROJECT GUTENBERG™
concept and trademark. Project Gutenberg is a registered trademark,
and may not be used if you charge for an eBook, except by following
the terms of the trademark license, including paying royalties for use
of the Project Gutenberg trademark. If you do not charge anything for
copies of this eBook, complying with the trademark license is very
easy. You may use this eBook for nearly any purpose such as creation
of derivative works, reports, performances and research. Project
Gutenberg eBooks may be modified and printed and given away—you may
do practically ANYTHING in the United States with eBooks not protected
by U.S. copyright law. Redistribution is subject to the trademark
license, especially commercial redistribution.
START: FULL LICENSE
THE FULL PROJECT GUTENBERG LICENSE
PLEASE READ THIS BEFORE YOU DISTRIBUTE OR USE THIS WORK
To protect the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting the free
distribution of electronic works, by using or distributing this work
(or any other work associated in any way with the phrase “Project
Gutenberg”), you agree to comply with all the terms of the Full
Project Gutenberg™ License available with this file or online at
www.gutenberg.org/license.
Section 1. General Terms of Use and Redistributing Project Gutenberg™
electronic works
1.A. By reading or using any part of this Project Gutenberg™
electronic work, you indicate that you have read, understand, agree to
and accept all the terms of this license and intellectual property
(trademark/copyright) agreement. If you do not agree to abide by all
the terms of this agreement, you must cease using and return or
destroy all copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in your
possession. If you paid a fee for obtaining a copy of or access to a
Project Gutenberg™ electronic work and you do not agree to be bound
by the terms of this agreement, you may obtain a refund from the person
or entity to whom you paid the fee as set forth in paragraph 1.E.8.
1.B. “Project Gutenberg” is a registered trademark. It may only be
used on or associated in any way with an electronic work by people who
agree to be bound by the terms of this agreement. There are a few
things that you can do with most Project Gutenberg™ electronic works
even without complying with the full terms of this agreement. See
paragraph 1.C below. There are a lot of things you can do with Project
Gutenberg™ electronic works if you follow the terms of this
agreement and help preserve free future access to Project Gutenberg™
electronic works. See paragraph 1.E below.
1.C. The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation (“the
Foundation” or PGLAF), owns a compilation copyright in the collection
of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works. Nearly all the individual
works in the collection are in the public domain in the United
States. If an individual work is unprotected by copyright law in the
United States and you are located in the United States, we do not
claim a right to prevent you from copying, distributing, performing,
displaying or creating derivative works based on the work as long as
all references to Project Gutenberg are removed. Of course, we hope
that you will support the Project Gutenberg™ mission of promoting
free access to electronic works by freely sharing Project Gutenberg™
works in compliance with the terms of this agreement for keeping the
Project Gutenberg™ name associated with the work. You can easily
comply with the terms of this agreement by keeping this work in the
same format with its attached full Project Gutenberg™ License when
you share it without charge with others.
1.D. The copyright laws of the place where you are located also govern
what you can do with this work. Copyright laws in most countries are
in a constant state of change. If you are outside the United States,
check the laws of your country in addition to the terms of this
agreement before downloading, copying, displaying, performing,
distributing or creating derivative works based on this work or any
other Project Gutenberg™ work. The Foundation makes no
representations concerning the copyright status of any work in any
country other than the United States.
1.E. Unless you have removed all references to Project Gutenberg:
1.E.1. The following sentence, with active links to, or other
immediate access to, the full Project Gutenberg™ License must appear
prominently whenever any copy of a Project Gutenberg™ work (any work
on which the phrase “Project Gutenberg” appears, or with which the
phrase “Project Gutenberg” is associated) is accessed, displayed,
performed, viewed, copied or distributed:
This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere in the United States and most
other parts of the world at no cost and with almost no restrictions
whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or re-use it under the terms
of the Project Gutenberg License included with this eBook or online
at www.gutenberg.org. If you
are not located in the United States, you will have to check the laws
of the country where you are located before using this eBook.
1.E.2. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is
derived from texts not protected by U.S. copyright law (does not
contain a notice indicating that it is posted with permission of the
copyright holder), the work can be copied and distributed to anyone in
the United States without paying any fees or charges. If you are
redistributing or providing access to a work with the phrase “Project
Gutenberg” associated with or appearing on the work, you must comply
either with the requirements of paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 or
obtain permission for the use of the work and the Project Gutenberg™
trademark as set forth in paragraphs 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.
1.E.3. If an individual Project Gutenberg™ electronic work is posted
with the permission of the copyright holder, your use and distribution
must comply with both paragraphs 1.E.1 through 1.E.7 and any
additional terms imposed by the copyright holder. Additional terms
will be linked to the Project Gutenberg™ License for all works
posted with the permission of the copyright holder found at the
beginning of this work.
1.E.4. Do not unlink or detach or remove the full Project Gutenberg™
License terms from this work, or any files containing a part of this
work or any other work associated with Project Gutenberg™.
1.E.5. Do not copy, display, perform, distribute or redistribute this
electronic work, or any part of this electronic work, without
prominently displaying the sentence set forth in paragraph 1.E.1 with
active links or immediate access to the full terms of the Project
Gutenberg™ License.
1.E.6. You may convert to and distribute this work in any binary,
compressed, marked up, nonproprietary or proprietary form, including
any word processing or hypertext form. However, if you provide access
to or distribute copies of a Project Gutenberg™ work in a format
other than “Plain Vanilla ASCII” or other format used in the official
version posted on the official Project Gutenberg™ website
(www.gutenberg.org), you must, at no additional cost, fee or expense
to the user, provide a copy, a means of exporting a copy, or a means
of obtaining a copy upon request, of the work in its original “Plain
Vanilla ASCII” or other form. Any alternate format must include the
full Project Gutenberg™ License as specified in paragraph 1.E.1.
1.E.7. Do not charge a fee for access to, viewing, displaying,
performing, copying or distributing any Project Gutenberg™ works
unless you comply with paragraph 1.E.8 or 1.E.9.
1.E.8. You may charge a reasonable fee for copies of or providing
access to or distributing Project Gutenberg™ electronic works
provided that:
• You pay a royalty fee of 20% of the gross profits you derive from
the use of Project Gutenberg™ works calculated using the method
you already use to calculate your applicable taxes. The fee is owed
to the owner of the Project Gutenberg™ trademark, but he has
agreed to donate royalties under this paragraph to the Project
Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation. Royalty payments must be paid
within 60 days following each date on which you prepare (or are
legally required to prepare) your periodic tax returns. Royalty
payments should be clearly marked as such and sent to the Project
Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation at the address specified in
Section 4, “Information about donations to the Project Gutenberg
Literary Archive Foundation.”
• You provide a full refund of any money paid by a user who notifies
you in writing (or by e-mail) within 30 days of receipt that s/he
does not agree to the terms of the full Project Gutenberg™
License. You must require such a user to return or destroy all
copies of the works possessed in a physical medium and discontinue
all use of and all access to other copies of Project Gutenberg™
works.
• You provide, in accordance with paragraph 1.F.3, a full refund of
any money paid for a work or a replacement copy, if a defect in the
electronic work is discovered and reported to you within 90 days of
receipt of the work.
• You comply with all other terms of this agreement for free
distribution of Project Gutenberg™ works.
1.E.9. If you wish to charge a fee or distribute a Project
Gutenberg™ electronic work or group of works on different terms than
are set forth in this agreement, you must obtain permission in writing
from the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the manager of
the Project Gutenberg™ trademark. Contact the Foundation as set
forth in Section 3 below.
1.F.
1.F.1. Project Gutenberg volunteers and employees expend considerable
effort to identify, do copyright research on, transcribe and proofread
works not protected by U.S. copyright law in creating the Project
Gutenberg™ collection. Despite these efforts, Project Gutenberg™
electronic works, and the medium on which they may be stored, may
contain “Defects,” such as, but not limited to, incomplete, inaccurate
or corrupt data, transcription errors, a copyright or other
intellectual property infringement, a defective or damaged disk or
other medium, a computer virus, or computer codes that damage or
cannot be read by your equipment.
1.F.2. LIMITED WARRANTY, DISCLAIMER OF DAMAGES - Except for the “Right
of Replacement or Refund” described in paragraph 1.F.3, the Project
Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation, the owner of the Project
Gutenberg™ trademark, and any other party distributing a Project
Gutenberg™ electronic work under this agreement, disclaim all
liability to you for damages, costs and expenses, including legal
fees. YOU AGREE THAT YOU HAVE NO REMEDIES FOR NEGLIGENCE, STRICT
LIABILITY, BREACH OF WARRANTY OR BREACH OF CONTRACT EXCEPT THOSE
PROVIDED IN PARAGRAPH 1.F.3. YOU AGREE THAT THE FOUNDATION, THE
TRADEMARK OWNER, AND ANY DISTRIBUTOR UNDER THIS AGREEMENT WILL NOT BE
LIABLE TO YOU FOR ACTUAL, DIRECT, INDIRECT, CONSEQUENTIAL, PUNITIVE OR
INCIDENTAL DAMAGES EVEN IF YOU GIVE NOTICE OF THE POSSIBILITY OF SUCH
DAMAGE.
1.F.3. LIMITED RIGHT OF REPLACEMENT OR REFUND - If you discover a
defect in this electronic work within 90 days of receiving it, you can
receive a refund of the money (if any) you paid for it by sending a
written explanation to the person you received the work from. If you
received the work on a physical medium, you must return the medium
with your written explanation. The person or entity that provided you
with the defective work may elect to provide a replacement copy in
lieu of a refund. If you received the work electronically, the person
or entity providing it to you may choose to give you a second
opportunity to receive the work electronically in lieu of a refund. If
the second copy is also defective, you may demand a refund in writing
without further opportunities to fix the problem.
1.F.4. Except for the limited right of replacement or refund set forth
in paragraph 1.F.3, this work is provided to you ‘AS-IS’, WITH NO
OTHER WARRANTIES OF ANY KIND, EXPRESS OR IMPLIED, INCLUDING BUT NOT
LIMITED TO WARRANTIES OF MERCHANTABILITY OR FITNESS FOR ANY PURPOSE.
1.F.5. Some states do not allow disclaimers of certain implied
warranties or the exclusion or limitation of certain types of
damages. If any disclaimer or limitation set forth in this agreement
violates the law of the state applicable to this agreement, the
agreement shall be interpreted to make the maximum disclaimer or
limitation permitted by the applicable state law. The invalidity or
unenforceability of any provision of this agreement shall not void the
remaining provisions.
1.F.6. INDEMNITY - You agree to indemnify and hold the Foundation, the
trademark owner, any agent or employee of the Foundation, anyone
providing copies of Project Gutenberg™ electronic works in
accordance with this agreement, and any volunteers associated with the
production, promotion and distribution of Project Gutenberg™
electronic works, harmless from all liability, costs and expenses,
including legal fees, that arise directly or indirectly from any of
the following which you do or cause to occur: (a) distribution of this
or any Project Gutenberg™ work, (b) alteration, modification, or
additions or deletions to any Project Gutenberg™ work, and (c) any
Defect you cause.
Section 2. Information about the Mission of Project Gutenberg™
Project Gutenberg™ is synonymous with the free distribution of
electronic works in formats readable by the widest variety of
computers including obsolete, old, middle-aged and new computers. It
exists because of the efforts of hundreds of volunteers and donations
from people in all walks of life.
Volunteers and financial support to provide volunteers with the
assistance they need are critical to reaching Project Gutenberg™’s
goals and ensuring that the Project Gutenberg™ collection will
remain freely available for generations to come. In 2001, the Project
Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation was created to provide a secure
and permanent future for Project Gutenberg™ and future
generations. To learn more about the Project Gutenberg Literary
Archive Foundation and how your efforts and donations can help, see
Sections 3 and 4 and the Foundation information page at www.gutenberg.org.
Section 3. Information about the Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation
The Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation is a non-profit
501(c)(3) educational corporation organized under the laws of the
state of Mississippi and granted tax exempt status by the Internal
Revenue Service. The Foundation’s EIN or federal tax identification
number is 64-6221541. Contributions to the Project Gutenberg Literary
Archive Foundation are tax deductible to the full extent permitted by
U.S. federal laws and your state’s laws.
The Foundation’s business office is located at 809 North 1500 West,
Salt Lake City, UT 84116, (801) 596-1887. Email contact links and up
to date contact information can be found at the Foundation’s website
and official page at www.gutenberg.org/contact
Section 4. Information about Donations to the Project Gutenberg
Literary Archive Foundation
Project Gutenberg™ depends upon and cannot survive without widespread
public support and donations to carry out its mission of
increasing the number of public domain and licensed works that can be
freely distributed in machine-readable form accessible by the widest
array of equipment including outdated equipment. Many small donations
($1 to $5,000) are particularly important to maintaining tax exempt
status with the IRS.
The Foundation is committed to complying with the laws regulating
charities and charitable donations in all 50 states of the United
States. Compliance requirements are not uniform and it takes a
considerable effort, much paperwork and many fees to meet and keep up
with these requirements. We do not solicit donations in locations
where we have not received written confirmation of compliance. To SEND
DONATIONS or determine the status of compliance for any particular state
visit www.gutenberg.org/donate.
While we cannot and do not solicit contributions from states where we
have not met the solicitation requirements, we know of no prohibition
against accepting unsolicited donations from donors in such states who
approach us with offers to donate.
International donations are gratefully accepted, but we cannot make
any statements concerning tax treatment of donations received from
outside the United States. U.S. laws alone swamp our small staff.
Please check the Project Gutenberg web pages for current donation
methods and addresses. Donations are accepted in a number of other
ways including checks, online payments and credit card donations. To
donate, please visit: www.gutenberg.org/donate.
Section 5. General Information About Project Gutenberg™ electronic works
Professor Michael S. Hart was the originator of the Project
Gutenberg™ concept of a library of electronic works that could be
freely shared with anyone. For forty years, he produced and
distributed Project Gutenberg™ eBooks with only a loose network of
volunteer support.
Project Gutenberg™ eBooks are often created from several printed
editions, all of which are confirmed as not protected by copyright in
the U.S. unless a copyright notice is included. Thus, we do not
necessarily keep eBooks in compliance with any particular paper
edition.
Most people start at our website which has the main PG search
facility: www.gutenberg.org.
This website includes information about Project Gutenberg™,
including how to make donations to the Project Gutenberg Literary
Archive Foundation, how to help produce our new eBooks, and how to
subscribe to our email newsletter to hear about new eBooks.
